Train wreck

People I hope to never again encounter on the "L"

Woman with silver boom box and headphones who kept singing more loudly and more off-key with each stop.
Diagnosis: Desperate attention seeker
Secondary diagnosis: Crazy

Woman allowing infant son to suck on the same pole that over 1,000 sweaty, filthy hands had grasped earlier that day.
Diagnosis: Irresponsible
Secondary diagnosis: Oblivious

Teen girl walking onto the train wearing enormous black and red angel wings.
Diagnosis: Desperate attention seeker
Secondary diagnosis: Drama student. Oh wait, that’s pretty much the same as the first diagnosis, isn’t it?

Woman reading Catch 22 while silently moving her lips and picking at imaginary bugs in her hair.
Diagnosis: Insane
Secondary diagnosis: In the membrane